


everything sucks when you're gone

by ninaxinej



Category: The Underland Chronicles - Suzanne Collins
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, Gen, I do what I want, No Plot, Post-Canon, Rated for cursing, character death mentioned (canon), chatfic, gregor/luxa is There but not a big deal, im not doing a good job of talking this up, just an F-bomb at the end lmao, tbh this was just for fun, this is a trainwreck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-05 20:20:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25831234
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninaxinej/pseuds/ninaxinej
Summary: Ripred: Luxa. Your Highness. My bond.Ripred: I will ask you again.Ripred: What in the name of Sandwich’s laughable, half-baked, self-fulfilling prophecies is a :P///Or: Gregor may be done spending time in the Underland, but there are other ways to keep in touch.
Comments: 6
Kudos: 30
Collections: TUC Week, TUC Week 2020





	everything sucks when you're gone

**Author's Note:**

> this fic was GOING to have a plot but honestly, i was having more fun with the stupid little conversations so. here we are! there are a couple of meaningful character moments, but for the most part, this was just something ridiculous for me to indulge in. aka: not at all a serious interpretation of tuc post-canon, so please disregard how messy and out of character it probably is.
> 
> on THAT note, i've posted some other fics that i'm VERY happy with so please give those a read!!! i do hope you enjoy this one though, as i did have a lot of fun writing it <3
> 
> the underland chronicles fandom week (2020)  
> day seven: free day

_Tuesday, October 26th, 2:32pm_

**[Luxa created a new chat with gregor]**

**Luxa:** Hello.

 **Luxa:** Is this Gregor?

 **Luxa:** I am writing words in the telephone that we found in the museum.

 **gregor:** hi luxa :)

 **Luxa:** Ah, hello.

 **Luxa:** What is this “:)” that you have sent me?

 **gregor:** it’s a smiley face!

 **gregor:** turn your phone sideways

 **Luxa:** Oh. I see it now.

 **Luxa:** :)

 **gregor:** you don’t have to be so formal

 **gregor:** it’s just texting

 **Luxa:** I am being formal?

 **gregor:** well, not formal for you

 **gregor:** formal by overland standards though

 **Luxa:** I see.

 **luxa:** how about this?

 **gregor:** yeah! you got it!

 **luxa:** this is strange

 **luxa:** i shall always be confused by your overland standards

 **luxa:** and your technology

 **gregor:** i know how you feel. the underland is just as confusing for me

 **luxa:** yes, but you are not among us any longer. i, on the other hand, must bear the burden of working this cellular telephone.

 **gregor:** it’s really not a burden

 **gregor:** nothing that the queen of the underland can’t handle

 **luxa:** you are too kind :)

 **luxa:** i am afraid i must go. ripred and i are meeting to discuss diplomacy between humans and gnawers

 **gregor:** sounds important

 **gregor:** talk to you later luxa!

 **luxa:** indeed you shall

_Thursday, October 28th, 9:04pm_

**gregor:** hey luxa

 **luxa:** hello :D

 **gregor:** aw you’re learning!

 **luxa:** yes. i spent many minutes brainstorming possible letter and symbol combinations in order to create a “smiley face” to send you.

 **luxa:** ripred helped.

 **gregor:** sounds like your diplomacy meeting went well

 **luxa:** if you must know, this brainstorming session took place after our very important meeting that will help us build a better future for all of regalia

 **luxa:** do you have any other witty comments to make, overlander?

 **gregor:** :P

 **luxa:** what is that

 **luxa:** is that a face?

 **luxa:** i cannot decipher that face gregor

 **luxa:** overlander. please explain that face to me at once.

 **gregor:** you and ripred can figure it out at your next meeting

 **luxa:** i am putting down my cellular telephone now.

_Monday, November 1st, 10:46am_

**luxa:** good morning gregor

 **luxa:** it is a tongue.

 **luxa:** the face is sticking its tongue out.

 **gregor:** morning luxa

 **gregor:** did you figure that one out or was it ripred?

 **luxa:** temp.

 **gregor:** ah of course

 **luxa:** yes. perhaps we should listen to him more often.

 **luxa:** but speaking of ripred, he said that you and your family were likely celebrating a holiday yesterday.

 **luxa:** i do not know how to spell it.

 **luxa:** holloween?

 **gregor:** halloween!

 **gregor:** how does ripred know that?

 **luxa:** he is a rat of many talents and a wide range of knowledge. i must confess, he continues to amaze me.

 **luxa:** what is this halloween?

 **gregor:** people dress up in costumes and get candy from their neighbors

 **gregor:** ok i know it sounds weird but it’s really fun

 **luxa:** this is… very interesting.

 **luxa:** what was your costume?

 **gregor:** i didn’t dress up this year

 **luxa:** no?

 **gregor:** nah we didn’t really have the money

 **gregor:** it’s for little kids anyway

 **luxa:** i see.

 **luxa:** then what of boots? and lizzie?

 **gregor:** lizzie was a rubik’s cube

 **gregor:** oh. you probably don’t know what that is. it was a cool costume though! she made it herself out of a cardboard box

**gregor: [1 attachment]**

**luxa:** please tell lizzie that her cardboard box costume is wonderful

 **gregor:** she’ll be happy to hear that

 **gregor:** she wanted ripred to see it too. can you show it to him?

 **luxa:** of course. i will schedule another meeting.

 **luxa:** ;)

 **gregor:** look at you! queen of regalia AND the keyboard!

 **luxa:** indeed. i take my royal status very seriously.

 **luxa:** and boots? what did she wear?

 **luxa:** gregor?

 **luxa:** are you still there?

 **gregor:** sorry, i’m here

 **gregor:** boots wore a bat costume

 **gregor:** **[1 attachment]**

 **luxa:** oh my, she is truly adorable

 **gregor:** i’ll tell her you said so

 **luxa:** yes, please do.

 **luxa:** how are you faring, gregor?

 **gregor:** i’m alright

 **luxa:** i meant without ares

 **luxa:** it is a very heavy loss. i have not lost my bond, but regardless, i know how it feels to lose a loved one. i am here if you need me.

 **gregor:** thank you luxa

 **gregor:** gtg

 **luxa:** what does that mean?

 **gregor:** got to go. talk later

 **luxa:** okay. we shall talk later.

 **luxa:** but can you tell me what this “gtg” means when you return?

_Friday, November 5th, 6:12pm_

**[luxa added Ripred to the chat]**

**luxa:** have i done it?

 **luxa:** ripred, are you able to see this?

 **Ripred:** hyehs

 **Ripred** : bfdknhleioyeaskl

 **luxa:** ripred?

 **luxa:** are you being attacked?

 **Ripred:** No

 **Ripred:** This is humiliating. The keyboard is too small so I’m using speech-to-text.

 **gregor:** ripred??????

 **Ripred:** That would be me

 **Ripred:** Hello over land or

 **Ripred:** Overland or

 **Ripred:** Oven gardener

 **gregor:** we get it ripred

 **gregor:** how are you here???

 **Ripred:** Well, when a mommy rat and a daddy rat love each other very much,

 **gregor:** i meant in the groupchat.

 **Ripred:** Yes, yes, I know. Please explain it for me looks uh. Looks uh. Luksa. LUXA. What the hell. Operating this phone is going to send me to an early grave.

 **luxa:** i would not say “early”

 **Ripred:** You must think you’re hilarious

 **luxa:** i do :P

 **Ripred:** What in the name of Sandwich is that

 **gregor:** ask temp!

 **luxa:** yes, i would say that our crawler friend is even more knowledgeable than you, ripred.

 **Ripred:** I will tear all of his crawler legs off.

 **gregor:** don’t they grow back?

 **luxa:** they do indeed. do your legs grow back ripred?

 **Ripred:** How do I leave this chat.

 **gregor:** how did you even get IN this chat?

 **Ripred:** We found another cell phone in the museum. Looks uh helped me set it up.

 **gregor:** really? another one?

 **luxa:** no. he lies. tell him the truth ripred.

 **Ripred:** Fine. I stole phones from the overland.

 **gregor:** ?>#@?$#@??@#??!??$?!?

 **luxa:** what face is that?

 **gregor:** YOU STOLE PHONES??? PLURAL?

 **Ripred:** Easy there, rager. I only took two.

 **gregor:** who is the other one for?

 **Ripred:** Temp. He was very curious about texting.

 **gregor:** i love that guy

 **luxa:** me too. shall we add him?

 **gregor:** yes!!!

 **Ripred:** You’re going to have to do it. I’d have better luck pressing these buttons with my tongue than with my fingers.

 **luxa:** fair enough :P

 **Ripred:** Luxa. Your Highness. My bond.

 **Ripred:** I will ask you again.

 **Ripred:** What in the name of Sandwich’s laughable, half-baked, self-fulfilling prophecies is a :P

 **luxa:** ask temp

**[luxa added Temp to the chat]**

**luxa:** welcome, temp

 **gregor:** temp!

 **Temp:** Be you the Overlander, you be?

 **gregor:** yep! hey buddy :)

 **Temp:** :)

 **Ripred:** What a lovely reunion.

 **gregor:** shut up ripred

 **Temp:** Not want us here, the Overlander does not want us?

 **gregor:** no! that’s not what i meant!

 **gregor:** ripred is just being a jerk

 **Temp:** Jerk, he is, being a jerk.

 **gregor:** exactly

 **Temp:** With you, is she? The princess, with you?

 **gregor:** yeah, boots is here! she misses all of you

 **gregor:** mostly you though, temp

 **Temp:** The most, the Princess misses me :’)

 **Ripred:** How is that family of yours doing, Overlander?

 **gregor:** we’re doing okay

 **gregor:** how’s everything down there?

 **luxa:** there is no need to redirect the topic of conversation gregor. please, humor us with some details. how have things been?

 **Ripred:** Leave him be, Luxa.

 **luxa:** it is not meant to be an upsetting question

 **Temp:** Upset, the Overlander is upset? 

**luxa:** no temp

 **luxa:** gregor? are you there?

 **luxa:** gregor?

 **luxa:** where have you gone?

 **Ripred:** I told you to leave him be, Your Highness.

 **luxa:** what do you know that i do not?

 **Ripred:** Nothing at all. I believe you said that Temp is the one with all of the knowledge.

 **Temp:** All-knowing, I am not.

 **Ripred:** Don’t be so modest, crawler.

**[luxa created a new chat with gregor]**

**luxa:** gregor? is everything alright?

 **gregor:** yeah i’m okay

 **luxa:** what is going on?

 **gregor:** i was going to tell you soon

 **gregor:** we’re moving

 **gregor:** my family and i. we’re going to live in virginia

 **luxa:** i see.

 **luxa:** is that far?

 **gregor:** yeah. it’s pretty far.

 **luxa:** oh.

 **gregor:** yeah.

 **gregor:** we can still text though! our phones will still work the same

 **luxa:** ah. that is very good :)

 **luxa:** it shall be different, though. with you so far away.

 **gregor:** i’m already pretty far away, luxa.

 **gregor:** my underland days are behind me anyway

 **luxa:** yes, i know this.

 **luxa:** but still.

 **gregor:** yeah. still.

 **luxa:** you know, gregor, no harm can come from a visit

 **luxa:** just once before you leave for good

 **gregor:** my parents would never let me do that

 **luxa:** who says they have to know?

 **luxa:** despite our recent war, the underland is in a strange era of peace. not to mention security is high. you would not be in any danger.

 **gregor:** it’s not just about the danger, luxa

 **gregor:** i’m sorry. i can’t come back.

 **gregor:** luxa?

 **luxa:** of course. i am asking too much of you. my apologies.

 **gregor:** it’s okay

 **gregor:** i’m going to miss you. i already miss you.

 **luxa:** i miss you too.

 **gregor:** <3

 **luxa:** what is that? another face?

 **gregor:** it’s a heart :)

 **luxa:** oh!

 **luxa:** oh :)

 **luxa:** <3

**Ripred:** Hey, Temp?

 **Ripred:** Would you mind telling me what a :P is before I somehow manage to humiliate myself in front of these children?

 **Temp:** Tell you, I cannot tell you.

 **Ripred:** And why the hell is that?

 **Temp:** t(-_-t) Fucked, you get, get fucked.

**Author's Note:**

> (yes temp saying fuck was totally necessary shut up)
> 
> thanks for reading! kudos & comments are appreciated :D
> 
> twitter & tumblr: prophecyofgray


End file.
